Random Wrestling

Man, I feel like posting about that good ol' wrasslin again brother! Maybe just for today, who knows, maybe I'll be back again in a few years. Anyway, I was looking at this blog for the first time in a good while and noticed in 2008 I did a little post about Florida 1984 and scarily enough I'm starting this here night, in the year 2015 BT (Before Trump) watching Florida 1984! I really think I must've managed about 3 discs worth of it in the last 7 years. But man I've been busy, what with this, that and the other. So anyway, let's get right back into it! Let's bleach our hair blonde, tape a razor blade to our wrist and hang around gyms waiting for our guy to turn up with the steroids/ somas/ horse tranquilisers, cos it's mid 80's wrestling and that's what happened (I think).

Ok, Gordon Solie runs this show unably assisted by the grim faced Buddy Colt, forever staring off into the distance, seemingly daydreaming about collegiate/ amateur wrestling and college/ amateur wrestlers who are now pros in Florida. Oh, and if they played a bit of football too, well that would be nice. Looking at old pictures of Colt the wrestler, with bleached blonde hair, I can't believe this is the same guy. Anyways, Jesse Barr is giving another of his really unconvincing, stuttering promos. He hasn't got it, move on. Dory Funk jr, Ric Flair and Solie, amongst others, are trying to make us believe he has but my eyes tell me differently. Flair comes out in Barr's corner, he's up against Larry Hamilton. Brian Blair joins Solie and Colt ringside. Blair says Barr's natural style is greco roman and he would've gone the Olympics but turned pro instead! It's all amateur mat based stuff and the pro werestling is rough around the edges. Barr finishes him off with a sort of cradle suplex into a pin which I have to say looked pretty boss. Flair and Barr talk smack to Brian Blair (who mentions that he's just got back from Japan, although sadly not rocking a Ribera jacket).

Flair vs Rhodes $1 million challenge match - Starrcade 1984 - watch at Eddie Graham Stadium.

Now it's Bob "Mr Personality" Backlund cutting a promo about wrestling the winner of the Flair/ Rhodes title match. According to Solie Bob's got backers who are willing to put up a $500,000 bond to secure the fight. I can't imagine who these backers are, maybe Bob was the original Nigerian Prince e-mail scammer. As we cut to commercials, Backlund and Colt discuss the local bus timetable changes and what funerals they are attending this week.

I guess the 70's must've been a very different time cos former world champs Backlund and Funk jr are as boring and as miserable on the mic as someone whose just been told he's got 1 day left to live.

Gordon now tells us that Sweet Brown Sugar used to be a high hurdler and running back. Hopefully someone channel surfing who usually sneers at this fake fighting, pro wrestling lark will hear that one of the carny brethrin can actually do real sports and then become a fan. Let us hope so.

Colt suddenly wakes up out of his amateur wrestling daze and spouts out that the Russians eat our food and drive our cars! A call to arms indeed. The Russians are Neidhart and Darsow managed by The Saint. Now Neidhart actually first visited Russia when he went to a track event as a shot putter. So see, real sport is bad and turns you communist kids. So strap a blade to your wrist or in your shorts or under your tongue and be a pro wrestler instead!

Now it's Superstar Graham vs Barr. Superstar ain't like Backlund or Funk jr, he's still the promo king baby! He's in a weird position here, just seems happy for a job and money and his past glories seem a long way from this bald headed Bruce Lee wannabe posing in the ring. But he's still great and prepared to bump around. To be fair, Barr looks pretty good here and ends up winning using the ropes for the pin, then he cracks Superstar over the head with a chair.

It's back to Gordon and Brian Blair and more missing Florida kids. Cue Mr Blair. "I know I'm going to be out there looking for children and I hope you guys are too". And on that note we move on.